The Halls of My Mind

Wondering the halls of my mind,
Complexity reigns,
and curiosity controls.

Rambling through the world,
Passion a must,
Yet all is so uncertain.

Destiny in sight,
Yet so much life is left.
How much longer must we wait?

This Time

Will you be here tomorrow?
When I wake up,
Will everything be different,
Will you be gone.
Will you stick around for a while
...this time

4:30 PM

It is only 4:30,
but I could so go to sleep.
I'm so comfortable,
content,
and completely at peace.

Laying here, stretched out
in my fuzzy duck pants,
and my bra.
Feather comforter.
Window open.
So quiet.

Think, pray,
blissfully drift off to sleep.

Purple Like My Room

Purple like my room,
I sit down to paint my fingers
and toes too,
Paint them both, purple, like my room.
Looking in the mirror,
"Mom can I get my hair tipped in purple,
purple, like my room?"

Life, Love, Reality

love, life, reality
these words contradict so harshly
desiring to understand one, brings
the other two crashing down,
down upon one’s self.

Come to consciousness under a pile
of thoughts, feelings, emotions.
Not sure which way to go,
turning in circles,
getting nothing done.

I don’t know what this is I feel.
I feel, but cannot explain.
Confusion consumes me.

Come to under the weight
of unknown feelings
of life, love, reality.

Wreck

oh my goodness.
you don’t know,
what it is you’ve done.

I was so afraid,
afraid you’d been killed.
I was so scared.

I don’t know how
I could have gone on
if you’d been ripped from my life.

I love you so deeply.
you're one of my best friends,
despite our differences.

please, be careful.
guard your life
as though it was mine.

you would do anything for me,
and yet,
you despise yourself.

For me,
From me,
Take care of yourself,
Please.

Eruption

Don’t talk to me
if all your going to do
is complain.
Complain about how your life sucks,
Complain about how no one cares,
Complain about how I ignore you.
If I was ignoring you,
I wouldn’t have answered the phone!

Don’t make yourself so special.
The world isn’t about you,
It does not revolve around you.
I don’t let you in my life,
Because then you’d push me out!

If I’m going to lose my life,
it won’t be to you.
I’ll find someone who cares,
someone who shares
their joys as well as their pain.

It’s ok that you cause me anger.
It gives me reason to write.
It opens up my expressway to expression.
Your anger allows me to release my frustration
And only burden the paper on which I write.

Longing

I long for a gentle touch.
Just to know someone cares.
Wrap your arms around me,
Just let me cry.
I don’t want you,
I just want to know
that someone wants to care.

Your Pain is Mine

It hurts so much.
The pain all feels new again.

I care so much about him.
Why does he have to face the same?

It hurts me so much,
To see him hurting, like he is.

I don’t suppose there’s anything I can do.
Just listen.

Listen.
To what he says, and what he doesn’t.

My friend, the pain, it hurts,
me, almost, as it does you.

Freedom

Where is this freedom?
You tell me I’m free,
But where do I find it?
I look around myself,
I don’t understand.
Where is my freedom?

Freedom is in our choices,
And in the way we live.
The way we go about our day,
And how we express ourselves.
Freedom means you own yourself,
And choose your own destiny.

Freedom is in our responsibilities,
As a united people,
We must serve each other,
So we may remain free.

Feelings Change

I can’t fight this war any longer,
I can’t control these feelings in me,
They are struggling to be released.
I must let them out,
Tell you how I feel,
And what this does to me
But…

How do I describe your caring heart,
How I can’t care for you any longer?

Back Again

Sometimes things have to be learned the hard way.
I just can’t seem to learn
from others mistakes
or my own.
When will I understand?
No matter how many times,
how many ways,
I still go back again.
When will I learn that this must be stopped.

Hate & Again

I hate him with a passion,
the only problem?
the passion is still there.

Mostly I wish he’d disappear,
Be gone from my life,
But then he’d torment others.

I wouldn’t have to see,
but just to know,
my friend has fallen.

I can’t leave her alone!
But what is there
for me to do?
---
This beast, this monster,
I dated him, I loved him,
I hate him.

How dare he even touch me;
Again.
Or my friend.

Leave Room For the Wrath of God

If we fight and argue
We become no better,
gain nothing.
We must turn the other cheek,
Be rid of all our bitterness,
Leave room for the wrath of God.
Be rid of your grudges.
Be kind and passionate,
to all mankind.

To Be Me

I wish to be successful
...and go to a good school
I wish to be happy
...and live a good life
I wish to have peace
...and resolve conflicts in me
I wish to be free
...not tied-down
I wish to be me
...let me be!

Let Me Alone

You confuse me so
I don’t want you
I have you
I can’t hurt you
I won’t hurt you

I miss my freedom
I miss my singleness
I miss my guys

I want to be flirt
I want to be free
I want to have full control of me

Don’t tell me what to do
Don’t pin me down
Let me alone
before I revoke you and yours.

Un-Boxed

I feel as though
I’ve been living my life,
living my faith
contained in a box.

Jesus,
release me,
Jesus,
untie me,
Jesus,
open my box.

I long to live for you.

Go With Me

I want to take you
with me
on that day of judgment
that day when we rise
rise to meet our Maker
our Creator
our Savior
when we meet out Maker
I want you to go with me
on that day

I see

Why is it I don’t care?
Why did it take me so long to see?
He is everything I want and
My best friend as well.
Why is it I don’t care?

I miss him horribly,
I want him to come home.
I’m lonely and miss my friend.
But why did it take me so long to see?

I want to talk to him,
Not just his voice mail.
He would put me in a better mood, you see.

I want to talk to him
And say what?

That I see.

The Friend

I say to you my friend,
Will you pick me up
When I fall?
You respond that it depends
How far I fall.

I say to you my friend,
Do you see what it is I've become
Will you help me?
You look at me and do not see
You look right through me.

I look at you, my friend,
And see
I have nothing to hope for in you.

I say to You my Friend,
Will You help me up
When I stumble?
You answer me,
I will guide your steps, so you do not stumble.

I say to You my Friend,
Do You see how I have strayed,
grown away from You?
You still regard me as an old friend,
And pull me into an eternal embrace.

I look to You, my Friend,
And see
I have everything to hope for in You.

*Bonjour et Accueillir*

Bonjour et accueillir à mon blog. J'ai pensé je donnerais cette chose un essayer...influenced par joseph. Oui, je sais c'est en français, Je suis plutôt amusé par la langue française, bien que j'ai failli échouer la classe cette année passée.

Just Let Me Be

Don’t ask me questions.
Don’t back me into a corner.
Don’t make me lie.
I will be polite,
but it won’t be real.

Just let me cry,
Let me hear my pen.

Wrap me in your arms,
Comfort me.
Don’t tell me it’ll be alright,
it’s not.
Don’t ask me questions,
Just let me be.
Just wrap me in your arms,
Just let me be.

Passionate Piano

It’s about the passion.
The emotion, the dedication.
How serious are you?
Your mood is reflected in your composition.

The pounding of passionate piano,
The boundlessness of silence.
How much they do have in common!
The power, the strength, the endurance.
The emotion is what it’s all about

Live On

January starts it all off,
A new day on a new year.
February, the month of love,
Is still cold from the winter.
March begins spring,
As the snow melts.
April may have showers,
But it’s always to dry.
In May, the flowers begin to bloom,
And the bugs of summer appear.
June, things begin to ripen,
Waiting to be eaten.
July, crack open the melons,
Let the juice drip down your chin.
August gets really hot,
As things begin to wilt.
September cools off a bit,
As the leaves begin to turn.
October, the month of pumpkins,
And of harvesting the fields.
November is getting chilly,
And may even see a flurry.
December is the month of white,
And the birth of Jesus.

The moments of our year,
All represent their own.
Have their own characteristics,
Temperatures, customs.
These are the days we live by,
As we learn to live on.

Magnified

God is good.
God is all things good.
He is magnified into perfection.
There are no words,
intelligible to us
with which he can describe himself.
Hence: he is the "I AM."
He is, he was, he will always be.
He is all good magnified.

Echoes of the Wind (Night Sounds)

Echoes of the wind,
Ricocheting noisily off the trees.
Listen close,
You can hear the night animals.
Hear the crickets,
Chirping their selves into existence.
The bullfrog,
Reminding you of his presence.
The one owl,
Hooting at
the field mice,
as they scurry below.

Victory

crucifixion
cruel, inhuman
beating, whipping, nailing
pain, blood, holy, pure
rising, shining, forgiving
perfect, sinless
resurrection

Melancholy

Melancholy is charcoal gray (with a hint of pink).
It sounds like an unhappy sigh
at the end of the day.
It looks like the dull gray
of the sky before a storm.
It tastes bland, or even bitter,
as though the sugar was left out.
It feels wet and gloomy
like a rainy day.
It smells disheartened like the dying
flowers at a funeral home.

Kisses

kiss
tender, delicious
lasting, loving, darling
the first is best
kisses

Summer Swimming

Swimming was a dirty brown
in that pond out back.
You could look at it and see
the tall brown capped cattails,
Get anywhere near it and smell
the muddy water.
Dive in and feel the cool water
and the mud squish between your toes.
Mouth comes open and taste
the seaweed infiltrated water.
Be still for a moment and listen,
just listen, to the silence of the dragon fly wings.

Illiana

Camp is a swirl of tie-dyed colors
Walk in and see all the people
Chattering fills my ears
Feel the warm embrace of old friends
The smell of waiting pizza fills my nose
We file towards our mouth watering dinner

People Watcher

I hear a large crowd of people,
In the midst of them I cower.
Staring up at the masses
as they pass me by.
They don't even notice;
I am just another random person,
scurrying on my way.
This is how they see me.
Little do they know,
Who I am, What I do, What I'm about.

I am a people watcher.
I sit and observe,
I watch, I learn, I imitate.
You disregard me; I digest you.
I watch your every move
I weigh it in my mind
against myself and others
I want to improve me and learn
Learn about people, and human ways.

I am a people watcher,
I watch you.

Tears

Tears are black against my pale face
They show my secrets
As I sit smelling the sweet incense
The slow sobbing reveals my pain
And the saltiness stings my lips
As they gently roll down my cheek

Emotion

Emotion is blue.
It tastes like tears,
salty, running down your cheek.
It sounds like joy,
shouting with happiness.
It smells like fresh baked cookies,
warm out of the oven.
It looks like a vast emptiness,
going on forever.

Death

Death is a dingy gray.
It smells like a rotting mushroom
on a musty dirt floor,
It taste like sand
gritty in your mouth,
It looks like a graveyard
one hundred years old,
It sounds like silence
so deafeningly loud.

Memories Never Die

(the death of a friend)

Looking around as I'm trying to cope,
Coming back to this strange truth, I now know,
For myself, a new future I must scope.
Here without you, my emotions I show.
My agony is allowed some relief
As I see you laying there peacefully
And then my body is flooded with grief,
As I understand what's happened fully,
Look at me, see what a state I'm in.
But it's not your fault, this pain I endure.
You can't help the struggles I have within.
Today is the last time I see you here,
I see you lying there, eyes shut and dry.
Don't worry, memories will never die.