Louder, Louder...

Maybe if I turn the music
up loud enough I won't
be able
to hear my own thoughts
blaring, racing
through my head

:)

A little bit of alcohol
Some good electronic music
Prompts a headful of thoughts
I can entertain myself for hours

posted from Bloggeroid

Effect

If you don't know how I'm feeling,
You don't know me very well.

If you have no desire to read what I say,
I tell myself you still care, just not my way.

If you don't know why I listen to what I do,
Then you've never been here before.

If my emotionless state dumbfounds you,
You don't affect me deep enough.

If you question what I say,
You're getting closer to the truth.

If I hear one more time that "it'll all be okay,"
I might show you that it's not.

You push, I pull. You pull, I push.
Nothing will ever be resolved.

*Player Piano* [Updike]

Player Piano

My stick fingers click with a snicker
And, chuckling, they knuckle the keys;
Light footed, my steel feelers flicker
And pluck from these keys melodies.

My paper can caper; abandon
Is broadcast by dint of my din,
And no man or band has a hand in
The tones I turn on from within.

At times I'm a jumble of rumbles,
At others I'm light like the moon,
But never my numb plunker fumbles,
Misstrums me, or tries a new tune.

-John Updike-   
New Yorker 1954

*From reddit: ...attractive when a girl has a good vocabulary*

*BillTheBastard comments on DAE find it instantly attractive when a girl has a good vocabulary*

"I like big words, and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
When a girl pipes up with an itty-bitty phrase
With a long noun as the case
You get sprung
Wanna say "good show"
'Cause you're mesmerized by words she knows
She's like a dictionary
So loquacious, man, it's scary
Oh, baby I wanna hear your prose
You're so verbose
My homeboys tried to warn me
But the way you speak
Make my knees so weak
Ooh, adjectives and clauses You say you know what a "promenade" is
Well tell me, tell me 'cause you ain't that average girly

I've heard them talkin' Just senseless squawkin' But she articulates, expatiates; that girl knows how to communicate
I'm tired of magazines Written by chimpanzees Take the average smart man and ask him that She must be eloquent
So Fellas (yeah) Fellas(yeah) Can your girlfriend talk like that? (hell yeah) Well say it, say it, say it, say it, say those lengthy words Baby: she knows"

Gnat in My Wine

black fly in your chardonnay?
gnat in my wine.
nat in my whine?
ironic or simply inconvenient?
I find it only inconvenient.

dirty things

we all have our share of dirty things shoved back in dark corners
pouring myself full of liquid drug, loud music, and metal
because i cannot adequately feel anything

Ryan Joseph

"I'm a father..."
Words I wasn't prepared to hear.
Words I wasn't prepared
to respond to.

I usually associate thoughts of you
with 3 Doors Down,
but I need Limp Bizkit, instead.
It really is significant.

Still not sure what to say.
Congrats? Best of luck?
Thanks for thinking of me?
...After all this time.


(I always have thought that you'd be a good dad. Do this and do it well.)

Me - End of a Decade

I'm unlike any other and original just like the rest. I fill my time with IT work, online classes, and SGA IT stuff. I love music, computers, and words. Hobbies include: riding my bike, mixing drinks, loving on my cat, various sorts of artsy things, fixing, and organizing stuff. I wish I had more time to read, but I always find time for xkcd. I like digging junk out of dumpsters and giving mine away (on freecycle). I cut my own hair. I like mushroom hats, classy people, and dry humor. Most of my clothing is dark, "earthy" colors, beyond that, I believe any day is a good day to wear black.

Alanis Morissette

alanis morissette makes me feel better about life
gives me hope that comes and goes
i see we've all made the same mistakes
looked in the wrong places for the right things
lost people who were suppose to care

To the Other Drivers

I like to play my chick rock louder than your music
I like to drive my car faster than yours
I like to ignore you and pretend that you care

A Little About Me

I am called a hippie
I am called the black plague
I have been mistaken for a freak
...go figure ;)
I listen to a little of all music
I like hunting for Bambi's daddy
I don't like people
...some individuals are okay
I don't like putting chemicals into my body
I drink mostly water
I recycle my water bottles
I don't hug trees
...but prefer to climb them
I like climbing lots of things
I am really a little kid
...but very much an adult
I don't like other people's kids
I will have my own someday
...they will know how to behave
I dislike people who choose to be unintelligent
I am not a fan of people calling "just to talk"
...but always have to have my phone
I am textually active
...but not sexually active
I am addicted to technology
...but enjoy times when it is stripped away from me
I love to go out and run
...even though I don't do it
I like to sit down for hours with a good book
...tho I don't do that often either
I do write a lot and often
...and random things, such as this

a moment of muse

Here I sit.
A misdeclared CS major
in the Engineering building.
Not knowing what I am doing.
So I whittle away at the wires
and their protective plastic casing
with my pocket knife,
while listening to Beethoven's
most elegant and brooding
moonlight sonata.

It ends.
I play it again.
Cut away a little more yellow
a little more plastic
a little more wire
a little more life.
Slowly drifting away
as with the moonlight sonata.

Life, it ebbs, it flows,
comes and goes.
So much is spent, wasted away
questioning the past.
Not listening to the music that is the present,
the beauty that is the now.

Complexity of You

Every time I hear the Garth Brooks song on your page I smile.
Not because of what the song says, but bc it'll go from rock/metal then to country and it reminds me of one of the things that has attracted me to you.
You have so many sides. So many interests. Diversity. Complexity.
It's Trivium, Garth Brooks, She Wants Revenge... And each different sound fits you perfectly in each different way.
And I smile.

Music Appreciation

They play my music
my hand shakes
she rambles on about opera
he, behind me, clicks,
- - - - - - - - - clacks the keys
we disappointed her, she says
I don't particularly care
us four in the back, sleepy

Norah Jones

Laying in my room
not really trying to sleep
knowing I need it.

Norah Jones on repeat.
Five; Six times, now,
and my mind wanders...

Spontaneous and Intimate Thoughts

as I lay here in the light
watching my ink roll
I contemplate my life
and all I've gotten myself into

I feel like an artist
deep in the night
having confined myself to my studio
until I produce some work worth merit

my eyes shifting
following the pen
everything falling in and out
of focus

listening to oldies
I know most of these songs
they're all before my time
they had good music then

pouring out my spontaneous,
intimate thoughts
personal or not
still, and deep from within

sleep drifts, closer
as my eyes begin to droop
and my pen nears the edge
of the
page.

Who Am I?

I am a confused young lady
who feels she does not know much about herself
but sees she is changing.

I am a computer addict
who is online whenever possible
and often puts it in front of other responsibilities.

I am a lover of music
who enjoys Enya, Black Sabbath, and Nelly
but can not carry a tune in her own head.

I am a writer less than I would like
who was ecstatic when published
and hoping for more chances of the same.

I am an independent teenager
who can take care of everything herself
but is still dependent on her parents.

I am a college bound student
who is a successful slacker
and yet is passing all her classes.

I am a drama nerd
who is involved in every school production
but is afraid of the stage (and herself).

I am just a geeky little girl
who looks at herself, questioning, wondering,
and can not quite tell who she should be.

I am a soccer player
who loves the game over many things
but would rather do anything than practice.

I am a bare foot babe
who hates shoes
and loves climbing trees.

I am an outsider, and probably always will be
who has many acquaintances
but very few friends.

I am a student of life
who wants to experience things hands on
and occasionally gets herself in too deep.

I am a rebellious spirit
who wants to go against everything
but rarely does.

I am a small child at heart
who wants to stick her finger in the peanut butter
and eat the cookie dough.

I am an untrusting individual
who resents anyone who tries to help
but wants one person who understands.

I am a lover of words
who yearns to expound upon my vocabulary
and yet cannot spell elementary words.

I am an ear full of piercings
who tastefully wants more
but must wait till the time is right.

I am a canvas made of skin
who paints its portraits with clothing
and accessories of all genres.

I am a hunter
who has yet to get her first deer
but is still determined.

I am an indecisive homo sapien
who is unsure how to classify herself
and is not sure she fits anywhere.

I am a Christian
who is not always sure how she feels
but knows her faith non-the-less.

I am an only child
who has three sisters
and one living brother.

I am a night owl
who will stay up till all hours of the morning
but do not wake me once I am sleeping.

I am a beautiful young lady
who is a myriad of things
and continues to improve on herself.

Melodies

I wish I could put in words
The melodies I hear inside.

If only there was a way
to express the music I hear

I could have beautiful
words.
Flowing
lines.
Graceful
notes.

Up, Down, Half-step
One after another,
Perfect succession.

If only there was a way to express the music I hear
inside of me.

Passionate Piano

It’s about the passion.
The emotion, the dedication.
How serious are you?
Your mood is reflected in your composition.

The pounding of passionate piano,
The boundlessness of silence.
How much they do have in common!
The power, the strength, the endurance.
The emotion is what it’s all about