Why Am I Responsible?

"Why am I responsible?"
Because you're the most responsible.
Because you care the most.
Because if no one else does it, you will.
Because they know you will.

Because you assume they're incompetent.
Because you don't ask.
Because you don't tell.
Because you assume they don't care.
Because they don't; not as much as you.

Irritation

Irritation rubbed,
makes resentment.
Wound not so deep,
now insufferable.

Impatience tugs.
Vision is blurred.
Stillness vanishes,
under rule of chaos.

Pause and breath.
Bring perspective.
Irritation is wrinkle,
life is satisfaction.

Struggling. I feel a need to legitimately call out the problem(s), but I don't want to be the one screaming and pointing fingers.

Used to Know

Ouch.
Thanks for the consideration.

I'll just pretend like you can't hurt me.
That's how I made it this far.

How many years has it been since we spoke?
Just because I move on
and you messed up your life
Doesn't mean I don't want to be part of it.

Thanks for the notification.
Thanks for the invite.
Thanks for the unfriending.
No thanks for the lack of information.

You always said you'd be around
You always said you'd always be there
Now you're no where to be found.
Now you're not even interested anymore.

Now you're just someone that I used to know.

Normalcy

Don't You tell me
what normal is or
what normal does.
For neither of us care much
for this Normalcy.

posted from Bloggeroid

Try. And Fail.

I try and I try
and I just feel stupid

It's not your fault
It's just the way I am

I hold my head high
and hold the tears back

I round the corner
and let them flow

I try and I succeed
except for that one detail

One detail.
I fail.

WHY did you DO that?
I... I... just thought...

I'm ...sorry
I'll do better next time

Although
A next time is unlikely.

Advice, you say?

I wasn't actually looking for help
Especially not yours
I was just wanting to share with you
Life and troubles

posted from Bloggeroid

Driving Pet Peeves

1 Individuals who consistently drive under the speed limit

2 Individuals who feel as though I should yield to their desire to go over the speed limit

3 Individuals with a handicap tag who drive/park as though their disability gives them a right to do as they please

posted from Bloggeroid

Spiteful

These days are killing my soul
Busy and not home yet

Technology has taken over
There's not enough art in my life

I love you, but
My science experiment is telling

I'm going to leave your leftovers
on the table till they mold

Clothes are washing
I am finally fed

Time to cleanse and intoxicate
And soon to write myself to sleep

Contributing Factor

Perhaps it's the loss of control that makes me feel this way.

posted from Bloggeroid

Wrong Side of the Bed

I'm mad at the world today
I need to go back to bed
because apparently
I woke up on the wrong side

Wedding Planning

Planning a wedding might make me an alcoholic
If it doesn't, I'm going to blame it on the wedding, anyway.

I talk to the dresses
and wink at my bourbon

I love you. I hate you.

I love you. I hate you.
I don't like dragging you in circles.
I want to hold onto you and push you away.
I want to rip you from my life and talk to you at every second.
No, I don't have a plan.
No, I don't know what to do or what i am going to do.

Posted

do i have a sign posted on my head?
is it on my facebook somewhere?
'needy people whine here!'

CRAZY

CRAZY
I am effin crazy.
What am I thinking?
Am I thinking?
WTF?!

I need to do some serious decision making
I need to pull on my big girl pants
and be honest.
Firstly with myself.
What is it I need to do
in order to move in that direction?
I need to surround myself
with good people and good friends.
I should seek out level-headed,
mature female friends.
I'm tired of the lies of
everyday life,
But Oh! how I perpetuate them myself.
What is it I've become at this level
to which I have sunken myself?
Time to pick up the pieces
and make a slow moasic of
what is left.



"Life is a mystery to be lived,
Not a problem to be solved."
~ Søren Kierkegaard

PROBLEM?

WHAT IS MY PROBLEM?
Why do I repeat the same things over
and over and over?

Pretty, Shiny Things

Perhaps,
the best way
to deal with my stress
and frustration
is to take
all my clothes off
and
put on
lots of fancy jewelry

Fight
my depression
with pearls
and jewels
and pretty, shiny things

Have
a drink or two
just to chill the nerves

Grr

Hatred.
Stupid.
Angry.

Life doesn't have to be like this.
...Right?

God(s) help me.

Take a Breath

Angry!
[Shoddy] shirt
[Witchy] sales people
Language, Sarah!

Broken computer.
Failing cellular.
Behind in classes.
Lists at work.

Patience.

Computer being fixed for free.
Waiting on a new phone.
Writing a paper.
Raise in my pay.

Personal Views

I am so frustrated.

I am trying to find some way to explain it, but I can't because there is no logic behind it.

People who are angry with me because of stating my views. I am not really even challenging theirs. but they are angry because they don't agree with me. or angry because i don't agree with them. or angry because they don't understand what i'm saying. or i'm not really sure what the rational is...

It's all religious things.

Don't start a religious conversation with me if you don't want me to tell you how I feel...

I don't know.

I am just grr...