Over

I've done it
now I must separate myself
It's over
unless I want the pain to grow

I can survive whatever I need to
I protect myself,
so I'm the only one who can hurt me

Someday that will change
and I will cry

Hurting Everyone

how ya been

stressed.

why so

i think this bout is due to boys.

uh oh who has hurt your heart

just me.

i refuse to give it to little boys to break.

so i break theirs.

...and my own.

well you shouldn’t give it to little boys only men who will cherish it and nurture it

i have/had one of those.

but i decided that i might rather play with the little boys for a while.

so i'm just hurting everyone.....

***

...soon...

I'll Figure it Out Later

I'm tired of the insanity.
I'm not living my mystery.
I want it to stop.
I've got to deal with a piece at a time.
But I don't know how
to figure out the whatifs and whatthens first.
I'm realizing that.

CRAZY

CRAZY
I am effin crazy.
What am I thinking?
Am I thinking?
WTF?!

I need to do some serious decision making
I need to pull on my big girl pants
and be honest.
Firstly with myself.
What is it I need to do
in order to move in that direction?
I need to surround myself
with good people and good friends.
I should seek out level-headed,
mature female friends.
I'm tired of the lies of
everyday life,
But Oh! how I perpetuate them myself.
What is it I've become at this level
to which I have sunken myself?
Time to pick up the pieces
and make a slow moasic of
what is left.



"Life is a mystery to be lived,
Not a problem to be solved."
~ Søren Kierkegaard