Too Much

I’ve been through so much lately,
I don’t know how much more I can take.
People ask what’s wrong,
Ask if they can help.

They just don’t understand,
Although, I haven’t tried to explain.
They don’t know what it feels like,
To bear this pain.

Say we all have problems,
They’re there to help me.
I can’t explain it to anyone,
No one really knows me.

Suicidal friends, death, and other things too.
Sometimes I wish it’d all go away.
Decisions to decide.
My own and others to help, too.

Maybe I try too hard,
Maybe I should just quit.
I do have these thoughts,
Maybe I could just die.

I really don’t want to,
And I know he doesn’t either.
I try to be optimistic,
And ask my Lord for help.

Passionate Anger

I hate them
People always looking over my shoulder
What's she writing?
Geez, she writes a lot

They have to notice
She always looks like she's been crying
What's up with her?
My goodness, she's weird

I can't stand it
Seems people can't accept me -just- the way I am
Why can't she be normal?
Just like us

They have to comment
She takes -everything- -so- seriously
Can't she take a joke?
Of course I can

I'm just me
I have my problems
Just like you
Why can't you just let me be?

No, I'm not 'normal'
What is that anyway?
I'm mentally sane
Or so I claim

I'm just fine
What about you?
((Why cant -you- be like -me-?))
((Cuz you are you and -not- me))

Nine 11

Today we remember,
Today we cry,
For those we lost,
In last September.

We lost a lot of population.
Black, white, tan, and yellow,
People from all over.
People from every nation.

I am Sarah, Myself

I am Sarah, myself.
I wonder what will become of this world.
I hear myself thinking.
I see what I can be.
I want to do well in life.

I am Sarah, myself.
I pretend to be too much of other people.
I believe there is only one thing to believe.
I touch everything I can see.
I feel wide-awake when I try to sleep.
I worry when I think of certain people.
I cry.

I am Sarah, myself.
I understand I can be no one but myself.
I say life does have a purpose.
I dream in pieces.

I am Sarah, myself.

Away

My own thoughts are so loud
I can’t hear the silence.

And suddenly I realize,
Your screaming.

You yell so loud,
Yet I can’t hear you.

I see you, I can’t hear you.
I try to ignore you.

Go away, I think,
You can’t hear my thoughts.

I’ve got to get up,
Go away, away,

Away from here,
Away from you.

You’ve gone through it all,
I trusted you with everything.

You’ve crushed all my hopes.
I trusted you.

Now I realize,
I’ve made a mistake.

I

I am from the middle of nowhere, woodpile climbing, and fishing in the horse trough.
I am from starting school, sister’s weddings, and from kittens, and playing piano.
I am from vacations, computers, and always friends.
I am from reports, guys, and the phone ringing off the hook.
I am from boyfriends, make-up, art, and running.
I am from church, camp, writing, teachers, and friends.
I am from high school, stress, cappichano, and house keys.
I am from soccer, break-ups, web cams, and piercings.
I am from deer hunting, depression, and burnt CDs.
I am from poetry, driving, NHS, and family.

Christmas is the Time

Christmas is the time to give not receive,
And don’t grieve.
If you don’t get what you want.

Christmas is the time
When there’s a chime
In the air,
And there’s not a care anywhere.

Christmas is the time to give,
And live,
Not receive,
And leave.

Christmas is a time for love,
Which comes form above.
Our hearts have to be right,
Or there might be a fight.

Christmas is a time for food,
Everyone’s in the mood.
We eat and eat,
Till we can’t stand on our feet.

Christmas is a time of singing,
And bell ringing.
Enjoy Christmas while it lasts.

This Time

You were never afraid of Death,
It tried to take you down many times.
Several times, it almost got you,
But you managed one more climb.

You tempted Death to many times,
But this time you didn’t escape.
It pulled you all the way,
And you got more than just a scrape.

I knew it was your fault,
But I couldn’t help blaming myself.
I warned you to be careful,
You said you wouldn’t hurt yourself.

You were too much a daredevil,
And it finally got you back.
I can’t believe you did it.
But you drank the whole six-pack.

You offered me a ride,
And I refused,
Said you shouldn’t go either,
You wouldn’t win, but lose.

Now you lay here, dead,
Still as can be,
Breathing no air,
Staring up at me.

I say goodbye for the last time, tonight.
I will never see you again.
I have just a few last words for you,
You were always my friend, through both think and thin.

Respect

Some say we aren’t respectful.
We should better respect our elders.
But I don’t hear them say
Many "yes mams" or "sirs."

I thought that respect was
A two way deal.
Some think to give us
Respect is unreal.

Well, I have news for them,
These few should take a glance
At what we have done,
And give us a fair chance.

Lock & Key

Turning endless pages of this tragedy,
I long so much
To once again be free.
If only my life was such,

If again I could feel free,
Like the way I used to be.
Before this lock and key
Had a hold of me.

I used to love you,
I’m not sure if I still do,
The way you’ve been treating me,
I’m sure were through.

Every time I see you,
I change my mind again.
Maybe I’m not as trapped
As I think I am…

I think of you,
I think of me,
I’m the lock,
And you’re the key.